Cooties [Blu-ray + Digital HD]

Great cast and I watched the whole thing, kinda regret that I did. Its not bad but you need to be in a corny comedy sorta mood.

See my full review at www.majorhorror.comHello again my obedient slaves, you are here again as commanded. In my never ending mission to give you more than you deserve I watched Cooties for you. Only these cooties don't make you itch, they make you kill. And they are spread from eating chicken nuggets, the official snack of the midwest/hell.This is the latest and only feature film from the directing duo Jonathan Millot and Cary Murnion. Rumors persist that they may or may not be dynamic, only time will tell. They own and operate an extremely innovative media company called "Honest" that "creates unconventional content in all forms". While I deplore the name, they have a very impressive catalog of media that they have created for a wide variety of media campaigns. Yadda yadda, I'll see them in hell with the rest of you. They just filmed it, they didn't write it. And since you always need more writers than directors and more gospels than gods, there were three writers for this movie. Called Cooties. About kids that ate bad chicken nuggets. Three.Not Murnion and Millot. But remember the early 2000s?!! The first of this unholy trinity is Leigh Whannel. Whannel is the brains behind Saw and Insidious. He is also the spleen behind Dead Silence and one of three suspects of the source of a foul smell in my trunk. He likes to take major rolls in his films, including this one. He sometimes dies, which is a shame since he is one of the better horror producers/writers on the planet. The second writer is Ian Brennan, who gave us Glee. He also has a role in this film. Don't worry, he dies early. And this one-Josh C. Waller. He produced "A Woman Walks Home Alone At Night" and directed one of the many short films (The Collector) in the compilation film "Fun Size Horror", which is available on Hulu. He also appeared in Nightmare Factory, which is a documentary. In some circles "Nightmare Factory" is an affectionate name given to my colon. So, two directors, three writers...onto the cast...which is just a fuckload of talented people.Elijah Wood- He and Waller produced this movie through "SpectreVision" . He plays a substitute teacher.Rainn Wilson- all around great guy and actor, hilarious, carried the movie, go watch "Super". He plays a gym teacher- do you really need to know any more? Sure you do so there's this:Allison Pill- You might remember her from "The Last Don part 2". Also "Scott Pilgrim", which I hated, and co-produced. Because I'm from hell....but even I have to draw the line somewhere. Getting hipsters to love something terrible is no longer amusing to me..and I don't want any more of them in hell. They keep gentrifying the River Styx area.And the rest, all comedic actors you might recognize from films and tv shows that don't suck. But they are all ultimately fodder for the conventions of this movie. The plot revolves around Wood, as an aspiring writer, Pill, as his immediate new love interest for some reason, and Wilson, who is Pill's long term boyfriend. And an entire population of prepubescent children bent on eating their flesh.No, this is the OTHER Elijah Wood Movie where a school gets taken over and the non infected have to kill everyone.So, onto the actual movie. The movie is a heavy hitting satire of the American Education System, annoying parents and their annoying children, and Food Inc. type food. It overtly mocked schooling and educators. It was clearly written and directed by people who have deep underlying neurosis and anxiety about school, and thus, it was fantastic. It was funny, and at the same time, immensely satisfying. An entire elementary school population morphs into flesh eating zombies after eating contaminated chicken nuggets. The virus only effects people who have not been through puberty- which makes the movie a perfect "us against them", children vs. teachers film. You get to watch kids die and you get to watch teachers and parents die. It was like a symphony of every fantasy I had when I was a young larva child. The plot device of only letting pre-puberty people be effected by the disease/plague/blessing-in-disguise was a fresh touch. Also, SPOILER, there is no scene where they pump the kids full of steroids and antibiotics to jump start puberty. There should of been, except this is not a movie about happy endings (how could it be, they haven't hit puberty), it's a movie about kids killing adults killing kids. Also it's funny. And not just because they kill kids, it has other jokes too!The movie is worth renting. It won't scare you but it is entertaining. Sort of like an extended video of "Another brick in the wall" with a touch of zombie.Three and and a half child skulls out of five.

Where to begin? Perhaps with the disclaimer that this movie might not be for everyone. The same way Wet Hot American Summer received pretty negative reviews right out of the gate from people who just "didn't get it", despite people like me being absolutely entertained by it, may prove to be particularly true for Cooties as well. With it's absolutely insane characters and looney toon energy regarding violence committed by and committed at children, it's a hilarious watch for anybody into absurdist comedy, though I'm not sure if it has solid mainstream appeal (which it should, but historically, I use "mainstream" as a kinder synonym for "bland" and "uninteresting to me").I won't go into exact scene details, since absurdist comedy, possibly more than other types of comedy, relies on that surprise factor to keep your reaction honest and novel. Generally speaking, I found the writing to be suitably bonkers, given the ridiculous premise of a zombie outbreak where only children are affected. What starts off as a creepy, quiet movie, where awkwardness is the main driver for humor, quickly grows in energy and escalating surrealism to match the ridiculous premise until characters are basically mugging inappropriate one-liners like 80's action stars while beating up mobs of children. The movie does suffer a little due to some "bigger picture" stuff (which I'll talk about below). While I feel those parts can resonate with people, it does derail the "escalation train" a little bit and can be a tad slow at times.The cast does an amazing job at committing to the joke whole-heartedly, despite playing characters that, with the wrong treatment, could remind you of the most cringe-worthy of Mad TV characters. Although I usually expect Elijah Wood and Rain Wilson to put in good efforts, my favorite performance was from Leigh Whannell (someone relatively unknown to me before this film) as Doug, the creepy science teacher with a few screws loose, who has several pieces of dialogue that I'm sure I'll be quoting with friends quite a bit into the future.It's not all slapstick and horror, though. There's nice subversive through-line about how adults stereo-type "kids these days". The film opens as fully invested into this type of thinking, with kids swearing at their parents/teachers and being glued to their cell phones. However, once they turn psychopathic zombie, they actually begin adopting many "old-timey" kid habits, albeit viewed through a distorted lens. Playing marbles, putting clackers on bike tires, and playing with dollies all become horrific symbolism that maybe flat-out regression back to the "good ol' days" might not be what we should actually want for our kids.Also on the more serious side, is the topic of how teachers are treated relatively poorly by society at large as being sort of a default position for those who fail elsewhere (despite how noble the endeavor of teaching children truly is). The protagonist's through-line regarding the cost of adult living and sacrificing time for their dreams just to get by (and thus having envy towards children who haven't had their's crushed yet) feels very relevant to the lives of post-college people in their late 20's and 30's, and something that I identified with very much.In short, I enjoyed it immensely and recommend it whole-heartedly, though I acknowledge that it's not perfect and may not be to everyone's taste.

Una película entretenida de humor negro bastante agradable, un infección convierte a los niños en zombies poniendo a su Bufet a toda la planta de maestro de su escuela. Me llego con slip rapido y seguro. Subtitulos eb español.

Supply teacher (Elijah Wood) tries to evade prepubescent zombie school kids aided by a motley bunch of stereotyped staff-room colleagues.Being a comedy spoof there are some laughs to be had but after the initial forty minutes repetitive scenarios make the film seemingly drag.It is a film in which the kids should be the stars but were rarely given proper acting roles when placed in front of the camera.We were expected to get our laughs from watching children being brutalised or as the butt of crude language.This goes beyond unruly kids. This isn’t St Trinians, and certainly makes  School Anarchy: Bad, BAD, Children  seem tame. This shares the same genre as child-killer movies such as  Come Out And Play [DVD ],  The Children [DVD ], and  Zombies - Wicked Little Things [DVD ]. While those films are genuinely gruesome in which children have to be massacred in order for the ‘heroes’ to save their own skin, this movie makes a sick joke of taking murderous revenge over kids.Even so, the film has nuggets to make you titter. School Anarchy: Bad, BAD, ChildrenCome Out And Play [DVDThe Children [DVDZombies - Wicked Little Things [DVD

Another zombie type horror but with a different spin sees young kids get the zombie virus when an infected chicken nugget ends up in the canteen. The virus is then spread throughout by scratches and cuts and the kids go after the teachers. Elijah Wood stars as the new teacher and Cooties has a nice mix of gore and comedy. Characters work well off of one another and Rainn Wilson as the sports teacher really shines. There's lots of running around and screaming and it's clear that the cast had a ball doing this. No real bad performances and script for this type of movie is good, takes a few hits, but gets its job done in the end. Only real complaint is that the movie seems to just end suddenly, we could have easily had another 10 mins, but maybe that just underlines what a good film this is, very entertaining and never bores. Watch out for the movie references, Cooties is so good you could well just watch immediately again after viewing. Shame it went under the radar when released.

This is another of those movies that surprises audiences with Elijah Wood's involvement - but once you've watched it, everything makes sense. The guy clearly has a nose for good material, as it's a richly quirky comedy, where every one of the teachers is a brilliantly fun character. When the faculty gets trapped in the school by the outbreak of a virus that turns kids into zombie-esque psychos, the teachers have to shelve their personal squabbles and deal with their odd personality issues as their already nightmarish students turn full-on nuts and start eating people. The film is rich with funny variations on survival-movie and zombie film clichés, and Rainn Wilson gives a particularly brilliant turn as a hard-headed egomaniac sports teacher. The film blends gore with absurdity in generous measures, and is filled with as many gross-out moments as laughs. For those who like an old-school comedy horror feeling to their laughs, this is a barmy good time.

£3? Free delivery with Prime? BARGAIN!***Small spoilers!***I actually really enjoyed this. I'm not a massive fan of Elijah Wood and it's not of the calibre of say, the Scary Movie series, but this was a good film.It may not have the best plot or a big budget, but it was quite funny. You certainly won't be bored watching it, it will certainly entertain you and that's the reason we watch films. Plenty of laughs and over the top cheesy gore that will make you say 'eww' whilst giggling.The opening scenes might be enough to turn some people vegetarian.I'm not sure why but the scene with the kid skipping with the intestines really made me howl.Certainly worth a watch and for the entertainment value, the price is a steal.