The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Know to Make Love Work

There are many excellent ideas in " The new rules of marriage ". I would have given it the title, " How to fine tune your relationship ". Reading this book could make the difference between a successful marriage and a divorce. Should be read by every teenager and kept on their shelf rather than getting read after everything has gone pear shaped. There are one or two ideas in the book that I don't get.I especially like the overview p 290-295 eg Winning Strategies : 1, Shifting from complaint to request 1a, " Move from negative / past to positive / future focus." It's too easy to focus on the angry words said in the past instead of focusing on the good times ahead and all the wonderful experiences in travel, music, film, books, sports, art which can be enjoyed together & talked about .1b " Make requests specific, behavioral and reasonable "Maybe that should be, " Make requests achievable, doable " but maybe if they aren't the reply needs to be like " I would like to make you happy, i just don't think i can do that "I've also just bought Anger Busting 101 by Newton Hightower which agrees in part and appears to disagree in part with Terrence Real about communication. Newton recommends that the winning phrases for daily use by men in marriage is, " you are beautiful, you are wonderful dear, I love you even when you are angry, I am so lucky to be with you " However winning strategy 4 Empowering each other 4b,Ask what you might do to help the responder deliver

What a find! Read it in two day and am immediately reading it again to start the process of action. It would have been even better if I had discovered it 30 months ago! I have it today and I am going to use it today. This is exactly what I have been looking for. The answer! It gives clear guidance on a better way to communicate with any fellow human being, married or not, but especially if married. Terry Real has another book titled 'I don't want to talk about it' which explains male depression in the most helpful, down to earth, understandable ways that is a real eye-opener and another highly recommended read.

Absolutely brilliant book.

WOW. This book is so insightful and helpful. Thank you Mr. Real!

It's as brilliant as everyone says. Better.

good book, but not very useful to me, some of the techniques are worth to try, but some opinion i just not think it's right

I'm actually amazed this book hasn't received more attention in the UK. I can only assume their marketing efforts haven't extended this far. I've worked as a relationship expert for over 20 years and this is without doubt my favourite recommendation for struggling couples.The content is truly amazing, Terrence brings things to light that made my work much, much easier. If you read this book you will rapidly become aware of which of what he terms 'the five losing strategies' are killing your relationship. He then talks you through how to fix them in ways that actually work and don't require years of therapy.The book is very readable and every chapter finishes with a summary and a practice section so you can't help but learn how to do better. These books can be very hard to read and this one is easy, it feels like there is gold on every page. As I said earlier I can't recommend it enough.Good luck with your relationship.