Thoughtful (Thoughtless Book 4)

5+++++ “Mornin’” “It’s better to never say goodbye, to just move on, to end the lie.” “She was mine” KissesI don’t know how to talk about this series without putting my whole heart on paper…that’s how much I love it. The Thoughtless series is one of my favorite series of all time…one of my top three BBF’s of all time…one of my favorite couples ever…it means so much to me that even contemplating putting my feelings about it into words makes me tear up – it just has that hold over my heart. I was really nervous going into Thoughtful because I needed it to be amazing…I’ve been dying to get into Kellan Kyle’s head for almost 2 ½ years...a lot was on the line. Well my thoughts, hopes, dreams and any and all expectations were completely and totally blown out of the water. Thoughtful was everything I could have imagined and then some…love doesn’t even begin to cover how I feel about this book. In case you haven’t read the Thoughtless series or met the god that is Kellan Kyle…then please stop immediately and go read Thoughtless…like, right now. This is a series that absolutely must be read in order and while you can read Effortless and Reckless before Thoughtful, you have to read Thoughtless first.Kellan Kyle…the rock star…the sex god…the man defies explanation. I knew from the very beginning there was so much untapped potential…so much promise behind those beautiful blue eyes…and actually knowing and understanding him a little better has finally given my heart peace. It’s not that Kellan never opened up in Thoughtless…he does…but hearing them tell someone their thoughts and feelings and reading everything straight from the character…it’s just two different things. There is absolutely no filter between Kellan and me and there is no way to fully express how deeply I felt everything he was saying. I knew it was going to be hard…I knew it was going to hurt but I did not come close to how incredible it actually was. It was like falling in love with him all over again. I found a new, deeper appreciation for this brilliant character that I already thought was amazing.‘When we pulled into the driveway, I shut the car off and looked down at Kiera sleeping on me. She seemed so comfortable, so content. I wanted to stroke her hair, cup her cheek, kiss her forehead. A surging desire was building in me to put both my arms around her and hold her tight. To tell her how much she meant to me, that no one saw me the way she did, no one cared for me the way she did. To tell her I cared about her in a way that sometimes scared the crap out of me. She was comfort and pain, wrapped up in one beautiful package…that wasn’t mine.’Kiera Allen…I have always had this love for Kiera that I cannot explain. I never hated her…I may have been frustrated with her – and seeing her actions through Kellan’s eyes didn’t change that…but on some level, I understood what she was going through. I didn’t envy her decision or her struggle…she’s faced with the impossible choice…her first love, the only man that she has ever been with and a guy that represents a huge part of her life….or this amazing man that lights her up and makes her feel things she’s never experienced before. I understood and saw her fear and reluctance for what it was. I think really knowing how Kellan felt about her and seeing her from his POV almost made everything that they went through worth it…because I have a new found appreciation for what her presence did to him and for him. It’s really hard to explain and I really feel like it’s something that needs to be experienced…in the moment…hearing it straight from Kellan…I just get it.“Don’t do this,” I whispered to myself between our hungry lips. This will only hurt us…all three of us. Be strong enough to walk away. Stop this. Her lips pressed harder against mine. Even as pain leached out of my throat in a whimper, my willpower dissolved. “What are you doing, Kiera?” What am I doing?She paused with her lips brushing mine. “I don’t know…just don’t leave me, please don’t leave me.” The truth and pain in her voice were undeniable – she wanted me.Her eyes were shut, so she couldn’t see the smile on my face. I won’t. I won’t ever leave you. “Kiera…please…” I’m yours…take me. My resistance faded away with a shudder, and I sought her mouth. I needed her. I’d always needed her. And she wanted me to stay…she wanted me with her…she wanted me. And I was hers.’My love for Kellan and Kiera might be at an all time high right now…their story, their feelings for each other…from beginning to end, I can’t help but love every single ounce of these two. They’re so alike and yet so different in so many ways, but the one thing they have is this unending desire to be with each other…just being around the other makes them more complete and I love that so much. It’s always been more about their emotional connection than anything else between these two and Thoughtless really showed me that. The joy that was brought to my heart with every time they held hands or he made her laugh or blush or when she would talk to him about his music…that’s just all I need in life. I’m a stickler for one thing…repetitiveness…I hate it. I can handle it in small doses, but if it gets to be too much then I start to disconnect. This is the same story as Thoughtless…so you would think the repetitiveness of reading the same story would drive me crazy – it did not feel like the same story. Every emotion and detail I was reading was fresh and new…and even though I knew exactly what was going to happen next, I was still holding my breath with each click of my kindle.‘She seemed amused by that. “Eventually you’re going to start making sense, right?”I laughed and looked out over the skyline, “Yeah…just give me a minute.” Or three, or four. I can do this…Respecting my wishes, Kiera put her head on my shoulder and held me tight. As I held her head in place and rubbed her back, I felt my unease dissolving. This wasn’t just anyone I was opening up to. This was Kiera. She had my heart, every corner of it, so what did it matter if she knew about the darkness that surrounded me? She would love me anyway. I was sure of that. My secrets were safe with her. I was safe with her.’I don’t know why hearing the same story from a different POV affected me differently…but it did. I know their story…the order of events isn’t different but the emotional impact that is had on me is 1000000000% a new experience. Understanding Kellan’s thoughts and feelings…seeing things from a new perspective…getting facts that weren’t exactly as clear the first time around…it was like reading Thoughtless for the first time. And god did that book gut me the first time around but for whatever reason I didn’t know if I was going to survive it from Kellan’s POV. The rawness of his emotions was something I don’t experience very often. Maybe it’s because he’s one of my favorites, maybe it’s because I love this story so much – I really don’t care the reason why it hit me so hard because it was the most exquisite pain and I couldn’t help but love every second of it. I feel like Thoughtful brought a new clarity to a character that is so deeply rooted in my heart, I never will forget him…and getting this insight on him was worth every second of pain…it made me appreciate him and love him more than I thought possible.“I love you.”The words were so simple, a barely speaking child could learn them, but they were so damn powerful….lives had been destroyed because of them. And their effect on me was immediate. My eyes burned as moisture worked its way to the surface. I shut them and twin tears worked their way down my cheeks. I felt like sobbing. I felt like laughing. Joy and pain spun around within me in an agonizing dance, and I had no idea which emotion was in the lead. She does love me. Someone loves me.I felt Kiera brush my tears aside. “I love you…so much.”Another reason I loved it…it made me love the D-Bags even more. Of course seeing them through Kiera’s eyes it’s impossible not to fall for these guys and their little band bro-mance they have…it’s an amazing combination and brings light and humor to an angsty series…but really understanding the friendship that they have with Kellan…it’s just one more layer than I couldn’t help but adore. Especially the Kellan/Evan relationship…that was kind of an awesome surprise. I mean…I knew Evan was a great guy but it’s not like I remember any of their conversations being that impactful, but this time around, I had a new found admiration for the way Evan helped and support Kellan. Something I was excited to see and really enjoyed understanding more was the way Kellan and Denny handled everything that happened. It’s no secret how much Kellan thought of Denny and how conflicted he was over damaging that relationship…and we get the basics on how everything goes after the fight…but I did feel like I got more out of that. The whole situation is messy but they’re all trying to make the best of it…and I appreciated getting more insight into what happened between the two of them.‘The memory of who I was before she came into my life, exactly a year ago, pounded through my brain – the loneliness, the desperation to connect – I couldn’t go back to that emptiness. I wouldn’t survive it. “I don’t want to be alone anymore,” I muttered, barely conscious of saying it. I don’t want to be without you anymore. Ever. ’It’s funny because while I was reading…and loving every second…I had the same feels that I did with Thoughtless. I wanted it to be over and never end in the same breath…it’s very conflicting and confusing…but it works. Now that I have a taste of KK’s mind…I want more! This shouldn’t be a surprise…I’m a Stage 5 Clinger and if there is anyone I cling to the most, it’s Kellan Kyle…but he’s like a drug that I will never stop being addicted to. Am I content with getting Thoughtful…of course I am…but I would gladly accept Effortless and Reckless from KK’s POV. Because…more Kellan is always amazing. :-)

‘This girl… she’d already made an impression, and I hadn’t even been introduced to her yet. The three of us all living together could be an incredible, eye-opening experience. Or it could be a living nightmare. Either way, it was definitely going to be interesting.’Yes interesting indeed! I want to start by saying that I am totally and completely in love with Kellan, so this book could have simply been just his grocery list and I would have gladly read it! Luckily for us though, this book was so much more! If you thought you loved Kellan before from reading the other books in this series, just wait, you’ll love him even more after this one. In the other books you learn about his past and you definitely get a good sense of the issues he’s had to deal with stemming from his childhood but in this book you really get to see into his heart and soul and it’ll break your heart seeing how twisted his perception of his self-worth is and how much he thinks that he is unlovable. This book makes it 100% clear why he felt so strongly about Kiera from the start and why he endured so much pain and ups and downs just for the hope of being with her, in some capacity.I only just read the other three books in the series over the past few weeks, so the main story was very fresh in my mind when I read this one. While this is essentially just a retelling of Thoughtless, it felt fresh and new and felt like I was experiencing it for the first time. The ups and downs, the pain, the heartache, the frustration it was all there again but at the same time it was a very different experience than when I lived through the story through Kiera’s eyes. In Thoughtless I spent much of my time wanting to shake some sense into Kiera, while my heart just broke for Denny and Kellan and I kept switching back and forth between frustration, understanding and anger in my feelings towards Kiera. This time around I couldn’t help but focus most of my thoughts solely on Kellan and what he was going through, I barely gave Kiera’s actions a second thought. I knew how hard it was for him when I read Thoughtless, but there was soooo much more that was going on in that head of his that I had no idea about and I LOVED getting to experience that here, even when it hurt my heart. All of the key scenes were included but they never felt repetitive, which is very impressive because like I said, I only just read Thoughtless 2 weeks ago.It was clear to me in Thoughtless that Kellan fell in love with Kiera pretty early on, but what I didn’t realize was how earth shattering that was for him so early on and my god it was just plain heartbreaking when he took some of Kiera’s actions/comments as rejection or thinking that she didn’t care about him, which only fed into his belief that no one could love him (‘Why can’t you love me like I love you? Why can’t anyone? How awful am I?’). He poured his heart and soul out to her in his unspoken thoughts time and time again and it killed me to see how desperately he loved her and all he wanted in return was for her to care, even just a little bit. (‘God, I just wanted her to care about me. I didn’t want to be the only one feeling this. I cared about her so much. I loved her so much.’). He was willing to take whatever he could get of her, because he couldn’t stand to be alone anymore, it was just heartbreaking. Even when he was angry and they had those awful fights (you know the ones, that time in the rain and in the back room of Pete’s) when he was spewing some pretty hurtful (albeit partly true) things at her, every other thought was him silently begging her to just feel something for him. Really I just wanted to spend the whole book giving poor Kellan a hug! In the first book I think my heart hurt most for Denny but while my heart still hurt for Denny here, it straight up broke for Kellan. The only reason that I didn’t lose it while reading this was because I knew how everything turned out for them, so I think that softened the blow a great deal, but it still hurt.Another thing I really loved about this book was getting to see some of those other scenes that took place off the pages of Thoughtless, like what Kellan really did when he disappeared for the day after the tequila incident (and realizing how different things might have been had he stayed) and then after it looked like him and Kiera might actually have a chance, seeing what he did in those 3 or 4 days when he took off again (that one was really sad!) and then of course what happened in the hospital. There were also several scenes between Kellan and Evan that I loved, you really realize how important Evan is to him and how important Kellan is to his bandmates. There’s a really touching scene between him and Evan at the hospital that brought tears to my eyes.I could probably ramble on for a while about all the things I loved about this series, this book and Kellan but I’ll spare you and just tell you that I loved this book and I’m so glad we got to see inside Kellan’s head and heart. I don’t know if it’ll ever happen but it would be great if we got his POV of Effortless and Reckless too but if not then I’ll just be thankful that we got this much! I definitely recommend this series and personally I am very excited to catch up with this crew again when Griffin’s book comes out this fall!! In the meantime, if you haven’t read this series yet, what are you waiting for???‘I cared about her, more than I cared about anyone, and I wanted her to be mine. Because I was head-over-heels, ends-of-the-earth, till-death-do-us-part in love with her. God, I was such an idiot.’

Absolutely love this series and the love story between Kellan and Kiera. This book is from Kellan's point of view and man is he 'hot'. Best hero in a romance in a long time and I read a lot of romances! This whole series is great even though I did not enjoy the female character in the first book she grows and matures and is very likable by the end of book two.

Si on a aimés, appréciés cet saga on ne peut qu'aimer la version du beau Kellan KyleC'est appréciable de en avoir sa version a lui de sa rencontre et de son histoire d'avec kiera .C'est une très belle histoire d'amour et on ne rester de marbre devant cet touchante histoire.

Non mi è piaciuto.Bam, così, senza anestesia.Dovete sapere che ho deciso di leggere questo libro in inglese, senza attendere che venisse tradotto in Italia, per un esperimento.Esperimento mezzo riuscito e mezzo no.Non vi dirò di cosa si trattava, ma sappiate che sono arrivata alla conclusione che volevo.Torniamo al libro e al perché non mi è piaciuto.Mai mi sarei aspettata che Kellan Kyle fosse un anima così disperata. Due sono le cose: o non me lo ricordavo io, o veramente agli occhi degli altri non appare così. Fatto sta che ho ribattezzato l'hashtag dell'autrice #KK con #KKilDisperato. Che fosse un cucciolotto l'avevo già appurato con il primo libro dal POV di Kiera, ma qui... virilità ciao ciao :/Altra cosa che mi ha proprio disgustato è che Kiera, in questo libro, appaia proprio come una s****** manipolatrice. Insomma, agli occhi di Kellan è proprio una p****** senza cuore, mentre nel libro dal POV di lei io non l'ho mai giudicata tale o.OInfine, ciò che non sono riuscita ad affrontare sono state le 560 pagine di narrazione sfogliate e sfogliate. Non ce l'ho potuta fare, davvero, io sono per gli stili di scrittura fluidi e coinvolgenti, che non si perdono in descrizioni e riflessioni lunghi capitoli interi :/In conclusione, sì, avrei voluto dare una stellina. Invece:1 stella per l'angst, perché quando c'è si sente eccome e mi è piaciuto un sacco.1 stella per la scena in macchina, dove #KKilDisperato sbotta come un indemoniato e per poco non ammazza/violenta Kiera.1 stella per Kiera, perché non riesco nemmeno a immaginare quanto sia dura amare due persone con tanta enfasi.

The Thoughtless series will always have a special place in my good reads. It might be my most re-read. I love Kellan Kyle in a way that I never have and never will love another leading male character in fiction. So of course a story from his POV? Honestly, it was my most anticipated read ever.Personally, I don't think readers should consider reading Thoughtful as a standalone. It is a complete story, but I think in order for a new reader to fully grasp the gravity and the perfection of the wrongness and the depth of the love story between Keira and Kellan, I really feel they need to read the Thoughtless series first. While Thoughtful is a great companion novel, a great compliment to an absolutely amazing series, it lacks that punch that Thoughtless delivered.

Thoughtful (Thoughtless, #1.5) by SC Stephens5 stars!!“Why can’t you love me like I love you? Why can’t anyone? How awful am I?”OMG!! The emotions!! I am emotionally spent and now all I want to do is re-read the whole series. I was very wary of reading this book as sometimes when an author writes a male POV for an epic love story such as this they can never do it justice and often fall short. I have read stories where it has been done before and I have come away bereft and feeling that the book destroyed my love of the original. However, I needn’t have worried, SC Stephens nailed this one. For me personally, I actually feel this is my favourite of the series. To get inside Kellan's head was pure magic, finally getting to see all his chinks and insecurities, his internal monologue, his past, his pain, while unbearable at times it has only enhanced my love of this series. In fact it has greatly enhanced it and I for one have come away from this book with an even greater appreciation. This is emotional, if you are a soft sap like me you will need lots of tissues, but I applaud SC Stephens, she really bought her A Game, this is a gem for any Kellan Kyle fan.Kellan Kyle, we all love him dearly, he was one of the first original BBF’s and we all have that emotional tie to him. He went the extra mile to get what he wanted, what he needed and he had never asked for much in the past, he nearly lost everything to get it, but he made it…just.When I read Thoughtless I loved both Kellan and Denny, but I loathed Keira. Thoughtless was the most epic of love triangles but was an addicting read none the less. It had people torn, it made people angry but it made us all fall in love with Kellan Kyle, the broken rocker that finally found love and it was a love so intense it nearly broke them both.“Your face is my light. Without you, I’m drenched in darkness.”You never really appreciated what Kellan went through in Thoughtless but Thoughtful goes into his pain and inner turmoil in heart breaking detail. He was conflicted, he was torn, he was in love, he was desperate, he was hurting, he felt guilty but most of all he was going out of his mind. The feelings he had for Keira were alien to him, they were daunting, he knew they were wrong but how could something that felt so right be so wrong?“I’d ripped off the Band-Aid, but the wound beneath it hadn’t healed yet, and I was bleeding out.”In Thoughtful Kellan’s heart is open for all to see, at times it was brutal, I cried…a lot. It is rare to have such an affinity to a male character but SC Stephen’s manages it with Kellan. He wears his heart on his sleeve in Thoughtful, nothing is hidden, he bears his heart and soul warts and all and it was heart breaking, devastatingly heart breaking.“I’m in love with you. You gave yourself to me, then ran right back to him. You. Killed. Me.”Another thing I loved about Thoughtful was also seeing the relationships developed between Kellan and his bandmates. Thoughtful drummed home just how close the bandmates are. How they met, how they started and how they will do anything for each other. How this bunch of misfits became the D-Bags, how they found each other and became each other’s saving grace. Kellan’s childhood was heart breaking, the little glimpses that we are shown give you an insight into why this man is so broken, so afraid of love. Having never experienced it, even maternally, never feeling wanted and always feeling as if he never belonged.“The guitar needed to be played. I needed to play it. It was a mutual, beautiful symbiotic relationship, and for a long time, it was the only relationship I had.”Kellan’s relationship with Denny is also developed, we find out how they met and just how much of an impact Denny had on Kellan’s life. Although they were only friends for a relatively short time, the bond that they had was for life. It is by seeing how their bond came about that you realise the depth of guilt that Kellan must have felt.“In a daze, I stared at the front door. They’d left without me. My parents had stolen my final goodbye to the best friend I’d ever had.”In summary this book is an enhancement, it is by no means just Thoughtless retold. While the story is the same as is the ending you are treated to so much more. As I have said above, relationships are developed, the plot is expanded and most importantly, Kellan as a person gets a voice. Yes at times it is not pretty, it is emotional and heart breaking but for me it made me love him all the more (if that was even possible). You will empathise, you will sympathise but most of all you may despise Keira a little bit less…yes…I did just go there…once you get inside his head you realise that actually, Keira never stood a chance.“Our history is a mess of twisted emotions, jealousies, and complications, and we’ve both tormented and hurt each other…and others.”