The Distance Between Us: A Memoir

What is it like to live south of the border and be poor? What is it like for families broken up by poverty when major family members must leave to cross the border and live illegally "in the shadows", sometimes being gone for years and sometimes never returning. And how are the children affected by being separated from one or both of their parents, often being left with relatives that do not want them and even mistreat them? In reading this remarkable book, the reader will find out. When Reyna and her two siblings finally themselves come to the United States, settling in Highland Park, a suburb of Los Angeles, a new section of the narrative begins. There are pluses in their new lives: some health care, better hygiene, good education by teachers that do not hit them, etc. The minuses: the father that brought them to live with him and his new partner (with the mother, strangely uncommitted to her children, returning to Mexico when he told her he did not love her anymore) has many emotional scars from being raised in a violent household and an ever growing problem with alcohol. It is evident that internally he is a severely depressed person that wonders himself at times about his own behavior. He means well, but he cannot overcome himself. Reyna is the only one of the children that completes higher education and achieves professional accomplishments. This book is one of them. Her writing style is solid, intense and natural. The mastery of her craft and of the English language (remarkable in that she started learning English in late childhood) is admirable. Yet she makes it seem easy. That is because it comes naturally to her. This is a talent she was born with. One wonders if she has ancestors that had the same talent, but because of greatly unfavorable circumstances, did not develop it or even recognize it. This book opens up a world of thought. Highly recommended.

Absolutely loved this. Heartbreaking. Hopeful. Incredibly important to read. Ordering copies now for everyone I know and their upcoming birthdays, and will buy others Reyna Grande’s book for Christmas. This book should be required reading for high schoolers. I honestly did not fully understand just how difficult it is to be an immigrant in general, or how hard it is on families and on their relationships when migrating. This book has truly opened my eyes. On top of that, it is incredibly well-written.

Compelling, sad, positive.

From the start of the book, reading the prologue, I started to tear up. I knew from the beginning that it would be an emotional book. As a young girl growing up in Mexico and then moving to the United States, Reyna Grande's moving memoir, The Distance Between Us, stories her life. The book examines the psychological and physical effects of family separation, immigration, and resiliency and is set between Iguala, Mexico, and Los Angeles, California. It's a really intimate factual story that is written with honesty and sincerity. The way Reyna narrates her narrative through the perspective of her younger self is particularly effective since it makes the emotional impact genuine and unvarnished. The way she manages to live between two cultures without ever feeling like she belongs in either one was one theme that truly caught my attention. It got me thinking about how many people deal with this kind of difficulty in silence on a daily basis. From my understanding of immigration on a human level, not just via politics or headlines, but through actual suffering, aspirations, and development, was broadened by this book. I became more conscious, sympathetic, and appreciative of things I had previously taken for granted as a result. I would suggest it to others because, in addition to being apart from an immigrant family, it also teaches readers what it's truly like to struggle for a better life while bearing the burden of everything, especially everyone you have in your circle, you've left behind.

I just finished reading The Distance Between Us by Reyna Grande. A few friends have actually recommended it more than once. I am not exaggerating when I say this is one of those books that will stay with you and change the way you see things. Reyna really depicts the heartbreak, hope and loss that she went through when her parents left her in Mexico to come to the US to try and build a better life for them. It chronicles the pain of losing your parents to the US and then finally making it here just to lose your identity and the feeling of belonging anywhere but still, against all odds, surviving and making your dreams come true. As a Latina whose parents sought refuge in the US after the war in El Salvador became so dangerous that their very lives were in danger and they sadly lost family and friends, I thought I knew the struggle. Honestly, I had no idea. I feel like my eyes were finally opened. I am thankful that my parents came here and escaped the terrors that were going on in their country because they achieved their American dream with hard work and dedication and thanks to that I have had a wonderful life. Growing up I never had to worry about deportation because as far as I can remember when I was little my parents were residents and there was never any worry of that. They owned their own home and I never had to worry about living situations. I was born here and, while my parents always made sure I knew where our roots are planted, I always felt like I belonged here or there. After reading Reyna’s book I have to count my blessings. Our "poor" does not compare to theirs. Children in other countries are worried about how many years will pass until they see their mom and dad again, whether they will finally eat something after days without food, if their homes made out of cardboard and scraps will survive the rain. You have to read this book to understand why so many decide to come to “el otro lado” and their resilience. I really think this book is a MUST read. I could read it again and again. I loved it so much that I am planning to read the Spanish version next!

I am addicted to this book my favourite book in a very long time! This is a real story, but the way she writes everything connects you with the characters and makes you feel inside the book! A must read.

Que libro!!! Fue verdaderamente una montaña rusa de emociones y un bellísimo final Sin duda le doy un 10! :’)

La primera parte del libro describe la vida de la autora en el pequeño y muy pobre poblado de su Mexico natal, la segunda su llegada a EEUU a los nueve años y su vida hasta los 20. Una historia triste y conmovedora contada de manera esperanzadora. Es la historia de millones de mexicanos que se ven en la necesidad de emigrar para sobrevivir. Muy recomendable, estoy deseando leer la segunda parte de sus memorias, que cubren sus estudios en la universidad y vida posterior.

Parfait

Emotional and raw. This book will give you a perspective you may not have had into the lives of those who seek a better life for themselves and those left behind.