53 Letters For My Lover (Original) Paperback – August 20, 2014

5 “Beetroot” “Scary Cherry” “Butterfly” “Fly, dammit, fly!” KissesHoly cow Leylah Attar…what did you just do to me??? I shouldn’t be surprised…but I really just can’t handle how much I loved this book. You don’t even know! Just…wow. 53 Letters for My Lover just blew me away…it was amazing perfection that had me from start to finish. The angst was phenomenal…my heart was in my throat…Shayda and Troy were breathtaking…I’m a goner for this book.Shayda Hijazi…oh Beetroot Butterfly…what am I going to say about Shayda. I felt for her. I may not have understood everything she was going through…but I got her. I got her mindset…I understood her logic and reasoning…and my heart still broke with her. This woman is tested consistently throughout the book and yet she still managed to hold her head up high and do what she needed to do…sometimes whether she liked it or not. Her inner strength is boundless…I really don’t know how she did it sometimes. To live the life you need to live…not the one you want to live is a very difficult task, but she made the most out of it. I don’t want it to come off like Shayda was absolutely miserable all the time…but she made a lot of sacrifices…including her happiness. I both loved and hated Shayda’s sense of obligation…it was a very admirable quality but it cost her dearly in some ways. She was the good, dutiful woman she needed to be and there is a lot to be said for that kind of person. Aside from her children…the only time I ever felt Shayda was truly happy was when a certain blue eyed man was present.‘It doesn’t matter.It doesn’t matter what anyone is doing or saying. I wish Troy Heathgate would stop looking at me like that. Time has intensified his gaze into a laser beam that zaps hazy memories of him into a cloud of smoky grey. Poof. Gone. Dissolved. Disintegrated. What chance do black and white rainbows have against full, blazing technicolor?’Troy Heathgate…I have so many things to say about Troy. Troy…defies explanation. He’s magnificence personified. He is a playboy…he’s brilliant…he’s sexy and confident and can talk his way into or out of anything…every girl wants him and every guy wants to be him…he’s illusive and magnetic and just flat out amazing. And he only has eyes for one exotic Butterfly. I was wary of Troy at first…I was honestly afraid he was going to break Shayda’s heart and that woman didn’t need to be broken anymore…but the second I realized he was more invested than Shayda was, that was the second I knew there was no coming back from Troy. The compassionate and caring nature he showed with Shayda…all that he does for her, the lengths that he goes to know and understand her…better than anyone else ever has…it simply stole my heart.‘Every hour we spend together intensifies my awareness of him. The scent of his skin, the shape of his nails, the subtle inflections in his voice – the savvy businessman, the charming bad boy, the sensual lover. Watching him eat, talk, smile, tease, it’s easy to see why women come undone around him. That insatiable appetite for life, the intrinsic confidence, the dark, dangerous allure wrapped in layers of genuine playfulness.’Troy and Shayda have an epic love…like…spanning decades. They have this long-lasting kind of connection that absolutely nothing can break and it totally captivated me. More than captivated me…it’s captured my mind, my heart, my soul! I can’t even pinpoint that exact moment it happened because they do not have it easy…and call me crazy, even through their struggles and the angst…I still loved and appreciated what they had. That’s part of what added to them…made them more complex and more real to me – they had so many layers and dimensions to what made them who they were…both as individuals and as a couple. They had so many different interactions that may seem minor to anyone else…but were treasured and special for the two of them. Troy and Shayda in all honesty, couldn’t be more different…in just about every aspect…and yet, they complement each other perfectly…they just get each other and click in this fantastic way that warmed my heart inside and out. And as if that wasn’t enough…they were scintillatingly hot…I’m not going to lie, I wasn’t expecting the level of eroticism I got but hot-d@#% did I love every single second of it. It’s all part of the Troy-Shayda amazing package…all part of what made me love them so.‘For a moment, I fought against the disarming tenderness of a stranger, the shame of being caught in a moment of weakness. Then his arms circled my waist, pulling me away from the door, from whatever heartache he had witnessed in my reflection. The fight drained out of me. I turned into the shelter of his embrace, and he, not knowing, not asking, took me in.Something changed in that instant. For me. For him. Like when the sun and moon align and the day turns into night. They finally see each other’s faces and hang, transfixed, even as their eclipse throws everything else into darkness. For those fleeting moments, everything made sense – the pattern behind the random trajectory of life, the infinite order beneath chaos.’Alright…so part of what makes Troy and Shayda’s situation so much more difficult is the fact that she is married. Before the pitchforks are brought out and we condemn the cheating couple…I have to say, it’s really not that easy. It’s not easy to say she should have gotten a divorce or they should have ignored their feelings…because Shayda’s marriage wasn’t that easy either. I’m not trying to turn Hafez (her husband) into a villain…by all means, he’s not…but it’s really something you have to read and experience for yourself…to truly be able to judge. There are so many details and extenuating circumstances that come into this that I don’t want to spoil…but I know in my heart…Shayda did not jump into an affair with Troy lightly. But it was the first decision in her life that she made for herself…and I have to applaud her for that.‘“Tell me.” His eyes pierce mine with a ferocious need.I moan, squeezing my eyes shut, but he presses his thumb and forefinger into my cheeks, squeezing until my lips purse open.“Tell me,” he rasps, harder and faster, driving to a harsh staccato drive.The intensity builds up to a fevered pitch. White hot bolts of lightning shoot through me. I wrap my legs around him as my toes curl in ecstasy. “I’m yours, Troy. Yours.”“Mine!” He lifts my ankles over his shoulders and slams into me, his body shuddering with a jarring release.“Mine, Beetroot. All mine,” he says, kissing the corner of my mouth as he spirals down from the heights of passion.Afterwards, he flips me over so I’m lying on top of him, and brushes the sand off my back. Then he wraps both arms around me like he’s never going to let go.’Another person I need to applaud….Ms. Attar. Holy s#!%…the amount of depth and emotion that she put into 396 pages of awesome…I’m in awe. The writing was beautiful…I truly never wanted it to end. And…I know this is going to sound weird…but I felt smarter reading it. The way the storyline unfolds and everything is told is very unique…it’s not all spelled out for you, there are some things that you just kind of have to trust that you will understand as you continue to read…and it totally happens. But I appreciated that Leylah trusted me enough as a reader that I would eventually get it…not that some things weren’t handed to me, but it was nice to kind of fall into the flow of what I was reading and trust in the author to take me everywhere I needed to go. None of the topics that are in this book are even in the realm of easy…aside from the affair there is SO much more…loaded, heavy, deep, hard hitting situations that just one alone is enough to carry a book and the risk with putting them all in there was totally worth it. It wasn’t too much…every issue gutted me in a new way…but the way they were handled and resolved appropriately...which soothed my aching heart.‘If we base our decisions on all the things we’re afraid of, we would be paralyzed with fear.I wrench myself away from the cold, deathly grip of despair, from all the worst-case scenarios, from guilt, from shame, from all the heavy chains that have shackled my soul. It’s time, time for me to make the journey of a thousand miles, time for me to take a leap of faith. I stand at the edge of the abyss and hesitate.Fly, dammit, fly, says Troy.I smile and spread my wings, gliding, soaring, rising over a golden valley where lemon groves lie cradled in the warmest, softest earth. I feel like I am home again. Because I choose love. I choose faith. And hope. And happiness. And dancing dust motes in the sunlight.’The ending…oh the epicness of the ending…it was fan-flippin-tastic…amazingness…and all I could have ever dreamed of. It’s like Leylah knew that I couldn’t handle a rushed ending and she let me savor. Every. Word. And I did…oh boy, did I eat up every single second of it! You cannot give characters a 30 year love affair and not give them a complete ending…and the attention that was paid to every detail, leaving no plot holes or issues unresolved…it was just perfection…this might be one of my favorite endings ever. I cannot even tell you how badly I need to read From His Lips, the companion short story to 53 Letters for My Lover…I can tell you right now, 86 pages from Troy’s brain is not enough. 86,000 pages from Troy Heathgate wouldn’t be enough. I promise you, he is that amazing.

I am honestly not even sure where to begin with my review. And it is not because I didn’t like this book because I did. I loved it. But I am not sure that my words could even do it justice. This book is one big roller coasted ride of emotions. It is a forbidden love story spanning over 3 decades that is beautiful and at times tragic and heartbreaking. This is Shayda and Troy’s story, a story of a love that is so real, and intense and beautiful.Shayda was sent to live in Canada mainly to get married. She is of Persian descent and it is customary for marriages to be arranged in her culture. She marries Hafez and together they are to start their life. Now let me just explain that their marriage wasn't necessarily arranged but their meeting was. Things weren’t necessarily easy for them in the beginning but they both did what they needed to make it work. Hafez would do anything to make his wife happy, that is the one promise that he had made to her. But he has demons in his past that affects who he is today. Hafez is in his own way broken, but Shayda continues to stay by his side as his wife and tries to make the best of what they have. Honestly he was a really good man who is very loyal. And yes they love each other but not in the way that a husband and wife should love each other.Shayda's marriage worked desire the demons that continued to affect them. But everything changed one day when Troy Heathgate came crashing into her life and made her feel things that she should not have felt. There is this undeniable connection between the two of them. But at the time of their first meeting they end up going their separate ways never to see each other again. But fate always has a way of stepping in. And somehow they keep making their way back to each other. The feelings and the connection between the two of them is still there. Shayda knows that being with Troy is wrong. But there comes a point where they both just act and give in to the feelings that has consumed them since they first met. Over the years their affair continues and at times life gets in the way breaking them apart. But see, the thing is this, Shayda and Troy were soul mates who were truly meant to be together. And when the moment is right fate will once again step in and help these two find their way back to each other.Shayda and Troy’s love was so real and so intense. Troy had it all but the one thing he wanted he could not have, well at least all to himself. He loved Shayda with everything he had. He was an amazing man who was very patient and very loving. He made Shayda feel alive, he showed her how to follow her heart. No matter where they were in life, whether together or apart, Shayda was always on Troy’s mind. She was the love of his life and she always would be.Now I will admit I am not one for cheating in books. But I think you have to fully understand the circumstances of their affair as well as the reality of Shayda’s marriage. Her husband was a good man, but they never married for love. Troy was her true love. And as a woman I understand wanting to find that one true love. And honestly the author has this way of writing this story where you didn’t judge her for her decisions. Because as the reader you understood their love, you felt their connection. You just knew that they were meant to be together and because of that I embraced their love. And I was rooting for them the entire time.Their love story takes place over 30 years. And in that time we see how much they love each other. We see their first moments together, the fun and happy times that they spend together as well as the obstacles that they face and the fight for them to be together. We experience it all, the pain, the hurt, the guilt as well as the love and happiness that they bring to each other. This story was certainly emotional. Two people whose love for each other is so intense, but you know that they cannot be together. But they take what they can get and live in that moment just so they can be with each other, to be able to feel each other and love each other. It's that love that keeps you hoping they will find their happiness. You go through this journey with them and wonder what decisions will be made. Will they ever be able to finally be together the way they were meant to be? Is their love strong enough to survive all of the obstacles?This book was so different that what I am used to reading. I think the author did a wonderful job with the story. There is so much more to this story that what it seems. It is a forbidden love but for me personally never did it feel wrong. It felt right in so many ways. This was a beautiful love story and the ending was just perfect. A must read!

Another beautiful and poignant story by the super talented Leylah Attar that I’m slowly becoming a huge fan of. I put off reading this for so long because of the infidelity factor in it. Usually such storyline doesn’t appeal to me and kind of makes me nervous but as it turned out not everything is black and white. Not only did I love the story, but it touched me deeply.I wanted to hate Troy so much. He seemed like the typical bad boy who thought the world belonged to him and he could have anything and anyone he wanted. But I needed so little to fall in love with him. How could I not? He completely transformed Shayda. Made her a different person – positive and energetic. As if he was giving her wings to fly just like the butterflies that started everything. Their scenes were so full of love, romance and passion that my heart melted from this cocktail of emotions. The sceneries were described with such detail that I felt like I was living in this word and experiencing every single thing with them.This is the 3rd book I‘ve read by this author and there is some kind of magic in her words. I can’t fathom it – everything is written with such simplicity and passion that you could feel it to the last detail. There were lots of hot scenes in this book and although I’m not a big fan of too much sex in a book there was some kind of intimacy in those scenes. Both of them kind of opened up to each other in those moments little by little. The ending was so tense and with so many emotions I had tears in my eyes by the end.I loved that the husband character – Hafez was not made the villain in this story. Yes, they had issues which caused the whole love story between Troy and Shayda to unfold, but his character was a positive one by the end and I sympathized with him. I even hope she writes his story one day.Beautiful, emotional and enthralling story, showing that the world is not always black and white. The lines are blurred sometimes and the things considered wrong could be those to change your life and make you live it happily and without regrets. I can’t wait to read the short story with Troys’s POV and hear his voice. He was such a remarkable male character <3

This is one of the most poignant reads I've had this year and if I could give it 6 stars, I would. This book is unique in the merging of the Persian and Canadian cultures and it is told over a 20 year time span, right up to contemporary times. I know little about Persian culture but I enjoyed and learnt from the snapshots afforded throughout the book. Shayda is Persian, beautiful, exotic but expected to marry once her family ensured her passage to Canada. Hafez is her husband but there were secrets she wasn't ever told. This first 30% of the book gripped me with its grim reality and the feelings it evoked in me. Troy is Canadian and someone who pops up in Shayda's life.Troy and Shayda are drawn to one another. When they were together, it was like magic, incomparable to your average love story, but when they were apart, it was achingly painful. These two had me in knots, thinking obsessively about the book and I almost couldn't bear to continue."You're dangerous. And you leave bruises. And your words disrobe me, and your kisses destroy me."I needed some hand holding to progress, but I am so glad I continued. What these two go through in their lives is gritty, difficult but quite wonderful."I lift the bed sheet over our heads, letting the light filter through the soft cotton, while we hold hands in our private little fort."I couldn't ever predict what was round the corner for these two, their families and where the journey would end. I am captivated by the story that Leylah Attar created. Her writing is seamless, exotic and conjures every scene so perfectly in your mind. I cried after closing the book, not during the book. The emotions evoked by this read leave me in admiration of this experience and the characters.Reviewed for Jo&IsaLoveBooks Blog.

4.5 Heartfelt StarsI've had this one on my kindle for a while, I felt reluctant to start it because I have loved all Leylah Attar's books and didn't want it to come to an end.This is a slow burn romance, where both parties try to fight their attraction because Shayda is married, and they both place value in that commitment. That sounds strange to say in a book about cheating, but if you read it you will understand. From the moment they meet Troy and Shayda feel a connection, but he seems to be a playboy and she the happily married woman. appearances can be deceiving.Its not an easy read, she doesn't cheat because she is in an unhappy or abusive relationship, she doesn't hate her husband. It takes a long time to reach a happily ever after for these characters. Life isn't always black and white and the book touches on difficult topics and the grey areas around love and how much love we have to offer. A beautifully intense story.

5 StarsBeautiful, emotional and EPIC is the only way I can describe this story.Set over a period of 18 or so years...it tells the love story of Iranian born Shayda and Troy ..Sent to Canada for a better life, nothing for Shayda is simple, she looks for a sign where her path will take her. Instead, an arranged marriage to Hafez is made for her by her family.Hafez is withdrawn at times and their marriage starts without passion. He's away from home a lot.He is a good man, a good husband but because of things he has experienced as a child he is left emotional detached.When Shayda first meets Troy, an up and coming business tycoon, seductor, a man who has everything....except the one thing he wants...her..Shayda.Shayda stays in the background watching....but Troy has seen her and is totally mesmerized by her.Choices, guilt... whilst we see their relationship slowly develop throughout the years into something beautiful we still see the pain, the feelings that pulls them closer and also apart.When she finally makes a choice will devastating events change everything?This is a very touching heartfelt story, beautifully written.Its a brave story to write and I think thats what touched me so much.I read such a mixture of genres, that when I come across a story like this, one that makes me feel the way I felt.....I know thats the reason I love reading so much.There were subjects that were painful, heartbreaking but the author had me consumed into their story.It should be made into a film..I cried, I smiled, I cheered....I loved it.Shayda and a Troys love story will stay with me for a long time..https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmMbi...

love the way Leylah Attar writes, it’s fluent and engrossing, she tells very good stories and this one is excellent. This clever story spans thirty years in the life of Shayda Hijazi. I wasn’t sure where this story was going, but it pulled me in and kept me reading.I loved Shayda, she is a fighter, despite everything that happens to her and she stands by her family, even though she can see a different life within reach. I was routing for her all the way through, I wanted her to find happiness. Troy Heathgate is a cocky, successful man, who can have whatever and whoever he wants…except the one person he really wants. I did like him and felt for him throughout the story. I loved the way Leylah weaved the other characters into the story and their lives, crossing in and out, some I loved, some I despised but that is how a good book should make you feel.This is a really good book and on you should definitely read.